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Spurs match reports

Spurs 0-1 Wolves: Personnel, Tactics Or A More Familiar Problem?

I’m not sure what the seven stages of grief are (or whether there are actually eight, rather than seven?) but the mood around these parts is encapsulated by nothing more than a wearied, philosophical shrug.This sort of shambles can no longer really be classified as just an isolated incident. We seem to be returning to the good old, bad old Spurs. Which is a shame, because over the first couple of months of the season I genuinely believed – fool that I am – that we might have turned a corner, and evolved into a team that routinely turned over the Premiership riff-raff and won all those “home-bankers”. Alas, not so.

Not for the first time a bunch of spoilers have turned up, defended for their lives, taken their only chance and scuttled off back up the High Road before we can even yelp “But just look at how much possession we had, dagnabbit.” When we score first (and early) in such games the floodgates tend to open, which is dandy. Generally however, that 10-man-defence-and-double-marking-of-Lennon routine is one that befuddles us. Plenty of encouragement then for other Premiership strugglers to adopt a similar mentality, and food for thought for our glorious leader, who needs to stumble upon a way to un-fuddle this problem pronto.

Despite this however, there is no particularly profound sense of morbidity at AANP Towers, just that philosophical shrug. The football we are playing is still decent, if not exactly scintillating. There was a slightly anxious resort to the long-ball once Crouch lollopped on, but generally we stuck to our principles, used the ball fairly intelligently (for this I doff my cap at Kranjcar once more) and made a handful of half-chances, against a side camping around their own penalty area. The defeat to Stoke earlier in the season, and also Man Utd a couple of months back, had me cursing far more angrily because on those occasions there seemed to be so little invention and movement. Losing at home to Wolves remains a horrendous result, but we have not become a bad team overnight.

The blow of yesterday’s defeat is also cushioned by the fact that our direct challengers generally seem to be matching us stride for stumbling stride. Villa may have overtaken us but their next faux pas is likely to be just around the corner. Man City and Liverpool both have the worrying potential to string a good half-dozen successive wins together, but neither have pulled away from us. We ought not to rely on others slipping up, but the fact is that everyone is doing it, even Chelski and Man Utd.

Disclaimer: As a fan, with no control over what happens on the pitch, I can get away with saying this. However, if any of the players adopt either of the sentiments voiced in the previous two paragraphs they ought to have limbs chopped off. Those guys ought to be busting a gut to win every time, because i ) it is within their control, and ii) they are paid to do as much.

’Arry’s Selections

As for matters on the pitch, ‘Arry sprung a bit of a surprise before kick-off. The absences of Bentley and Pav were understandable given the recent rumblings from the corridors of White Hart Lane, but while I searched high and low there was not a Jenas in sight. Interesting. Might we have benefited from the presence of his rarely-spotted alter ego – Genuinely Potent Attacking Jenas – in the second half, when Crouch was winning the occasional header but no-one was around to pick up the scraps?

Keane coming in for Crouch was an eye-catching selection. While the pointy-shouty tantrum he threw when not awarded a first-half corner was one which my two year-old nephew would have stepped back and observed in awe, that it was his most notable contribution says much.

At various points we had Defoe, Keane, Crouch, Modric, Kranjcar, Lennon, Giovani and the Hudd on the pitch, and still couldn’t score against a team that had kept only one clean-sheet all season. I am tempted to suggest that perhaps a genuine dribbler – a la Taraabt – may have helped to draw defenders and squeeze an opening (although dribbling is one of the assets Giovani supposedly brings), but the problem does not really seem to be a shortage of attack-minded personnel.

Tactically there were a couple of grumbles. We might have benefited from greater willingness from the central midfielders to get into the area for crosses, particularly when Crouch is on the pitch doing his nod-down routine. And a propos Crouch, bona fide crosses – ie from the wing, getting to the by-line – rather than long-balls from deep, might work better for the big man.

Generally however, although it’s a lazy conclusion at which to arrive, the principal problem was the same one we’ve had since the days of yore. A bloody-minded desire to accept nothing less than victory at any cost was conspicuous by its absence. Daws seems the only blighter with any leadership juices flowing through his veins. Somehow ‘Arry has to find the football equivalent of the Sword of Omens, to turn our poor lambs into a bunch of bad-ass commandoes with fire in their bellies.

 

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, or follow on Twitter here

And as ever, all are most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the players to be featured in forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann here

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Spurs – Wolves Preview: Which Direction For The Tottenham Bandwagon This Week?

Roll up, one and all. Tickets are now available for the Tottenham Hotspur bandwagon, which rolls into town once again on Saturday. Come the final whistle against Wolves we can all get a little too carried away once again, on a wave of euphoria/doom (delete as appropriate). The only question regards the direction in which we head.The finale at Goodison Park left several of our number kicking in their televisions, burning their season tickets and, with a final declaration that the team won’t win anything EVER, scrabbling atop tall buildings and leaping.

Well, not quite, but it was a mighty angry backlash. Should we follow up by losing at home to Wolves (or even winning unconvincingly) such places as the Comments sections of Spurs blogs will resemble a war-zone.

The mood at AANP Towers remains closer to euphoric than doom-laden (and not just because the entire first draft of Spurs’ Cult Heroes is now complete – get in!) on the back of our recent performances. We’ve goals in us, I tell thee, and I’m therefore peddling the This-Season-We’ll-Make-Champions-League line. Kranjcar and Lennon have been bristling with goodness in recent weeks, and although his radar was ever-so-slightly awry last weekend, Defoe’s movement remains sharp. Despite recent results we are playing well, and someone sooner or later is going to get a spanking. (And the last time such a sentiment was mumbled Wigan came bounding in to town.) Beat Wolves soundly and that Champions League drum will be given another pounding; such is life at Spurs. Black or white. Triumph or disaster.

(Why it is always one extreme or another I’m not too sure. Maybe it is the dawn of omnipresent media coverage, with 24-hour news channels and instantly-accessible internet creating a void for headlines that has to be filled constantly. Well if this is the case, I bestow a thousand violent curses upon that despicable breed who shamelessly use the internet to peddle their own incessant personal- what’s that you say?)

Glory Be. He’s Back

Ross: This is the most beautiful natural thing in the world.
Joey: Yeah, but there’s a baby sucking on it.

The second most beautiful natural thing in the world will be visible on Saturday when Luka Modric takes his place amongst the substitutes. You’ll know it’s him because he will be surrounded by an orb of celestial light, his presence having already been heralded by a choir of angels.

Three points, goals a-plenty and a late cameo from the little Croatian genius. It’s not beyond the realm of possibility, but this being Spurs, some daft alternative inevitably threatens.

 

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, or follow on Twitter here 

And as ever, all are most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the players to be featured in forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann here

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Spurs match reports

Spurs 9 (Nine) – 1 Wigan: How Defoe Compares to Greaves and Other Cloud Nine Musings

Good grief.Tongue was firmly in cheek last night when I idly typed.

…the modest wish-list from AANP Towers is simply that three points are garnered, by a healthy margin and in exhilarating, easy-on-the eye style. 

However, someone somewhere at the Lane took this far too literally and as a result poor old Chris Kirkland is going to need counselling.It’s only one game, but for now I think we have every right to strut. Back in the day, the old Grandstand vidi-printer on the BBC would churn out results with a comforting robotic facelessness on a Saturday afternoon. Every now and then, amidst the run-of-mill 0-0’s and 2-1’s, a team would score so many that the vidi-printer would have to spell it out as a word in brackets, just to assure disbelieving eyes that it hadn’t gone into meltdown, but that one team really had gone crazy and racked up a rugby scoreline. And today that team is us.

 

 

TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR 9 (NINE) WIGAN ATHLETIC 1 

Kranjcar and Lennon 

Presumably, the little chap in attack will grab most headlines, but from the outset the presence of Kranjcar and Lennon provided a balance, width and shape that was lacking against Sunderland last week. With these two in fine fettle we also had enough inventiveness to avoid any resort to that obscene long-ball nonsense sighted in recent weeks.Kranjcar mixed plenty of classy touches with laudable commitment in chasing and harrying, while Lennon crucially matched the quality of his dribbling with diamond-encrusted end-product. Once upon a time we flung our hands up in despair as a wonderful Lennon run culminated in a woefully misguided cross; today the Midas bug bit him and after repeatedly tearing Wigan to shreds he laid on a selection of final balls from which it would have been plain rude to miss. Good to have you back lad.

The early goal might have heralded a first half barrage, but we eased off the throttle after about 20-25 minutes, and there was a degree of unease in the half-time natterings in some parts of the ground. As it happened though, apart from those slightly wayward 25 first half minutes, the whole midfield purred like an immaculately-maintained Rolls Royce, sometimes just toying with Wigan, other times slicing them apart. It was particularly good to see Sergeant Wilson look once more like his old self, after a slight dip in form.

On other days, when we’re struggling to break down a stubborn defence in a tight game, the shots will bounce off rather than just inside the post (Exhibit A – Kranjcar vs Stoke a few weeks back). Such was the way of things today however, that even a long-range Bentley free-kick squeezed into a gap seemingly no larger than a 10 pence coin.

How Does Defoe Compare to Greaves? 

As one who has never been slow to sing the praises of the club’s all-time leading goalscorer, one James Peter Greaves, I asked Dad at full-time how Defoe compared. “Greaves was trickier with his feet… but Defoe is just as good a goalscorer,” was the considered reply, and although delivered immediately after the final whistle, at a time when euphoria was getting the better of all of us, that’s high praise indeed.

Defoe has some way to go to match a record of 266 goals in 379 games, but by golly he is going about things in the right way. He was an absolute machine today, three of his goals virtually identical, and all absolutely clinical. No messing around with fancy chips and the like, he just stalked the Wigan defence and pounced ruthlessly upon the half-chances.

Criticisms

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A Penny For Robbie Keane’s Thoughts 

Not as straightforward as that of course, although those with spleen to vent will probably consider that a case can now be made against the inclusion of these two ever again. However, with no-one having to jump through flaming hoops to accommodate Keane we were able to adopt a shape with which everyone appeared comfortable, while the Crouch-Defoe partnership seemed to work well enough from this vantage point.

Keane, it seems, was “rested” rather than dropped, following his midweek 120 minute stint for Ireland. Nine goals suggests it ain’t broke, but ‘Arry may nevertheless be tempted to reinstate Keane for the visit to Villa Park next week.

Our Vanquished Opponents

A handball it may have been for their goal from Paul “Thierry” Scharner, but I doubt there will be too many calls to replay this game. Wigan’s half dozen supporters probably felt relatively perky going into half-time with just the one goal deficit. Bless. Their curious away strip was an affront to the eyes, and as they miskicked and stumbled their way through the second half in ghastly luminous orange, suspicion grew that the fellas out on the pitch were not a professional football team but a hastily-assembled bunch of stewards. If we were all action, they were no plot.

The Warm, Fuzzy Nine-Goal Glow 

Every dog has his day, and even the most barbed rival supporters will simply have to hold up their hands and accept a hitherto unknown level of smugness from us over the next few days. Enjoy.

 

 

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, or follow on Twitter here 

As ever, all are most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the other players to be featured in forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann here

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Spurs – Sunderland Preview: Are Tottenham A Club In Crisis?

Are we a club in crisis? While I hate to disappoint the doom-mongers and mischievous press-men, it is a little too hasty to go down that route just yet.Come the full-time whistle we ought to have a clearer idea of where we stand. Naturally, this being White Hart Lane, moderation is not welcome. Our fortunes tomorrow will swing wildly one way or t’other, either back on track to challenge the top four, or sliding irreversibly towards mid-table obscurity and worse. Such is life at the Lane.

We’re Doomed I Tell Ye, DOOMED 

Relax. We’re Fine. Chill, Winston. 

We’re not as good as the top three, but Rome wasn’t built in a day. We’re competing for fourth, and will continue to do so as long as we show that the Stoke defeat was an anomaly. Until Stoke we were generally picking up points against the mid-table/bottom-half teams, and this trend needs to be continued throughout the season and beginning tomorrow.

Good News From The Fixture-List 

AANP’s Prayer For Tomorrow

After the Stoke debacle, the prayer of choice being humbly offered heavenwards is that we score early tomorrow, or at least score first. Without Modric (and possibly Lennon) we lack the je ne sais quoi to unlock a deep-lying, packed defence set on gaining a point from first minute to last (see Stoke). Score an early goal however, and we’ll be laughing. Well, maybe not laughing – being Tottenham, we’ll find a way to complicate things – but at least scoring an early goal will allow us space and counter-attacking opportunities.

I therefore find myself hoping that Sunderland have a go at us, or at least resist the urge to set up two banks of four, and then just sit back and repel. Should they venture forward (and the chances of this are obviously exponentially increased if we get the first goal) there will be a bit of space behind them to exploit. They will henceforth become putty in our hands, and we shall toy with them. As flies are to wanton boys shall the trailing Sunderland be to counter-attacking Tottenham. Then the final whistle will go and we’ll all live happily ever after, for a fortnight.

Worst-Case Scenario

We Spurs fans have turned the Ludicrous-and-Disproportionate-Howl-of-Anguish-and-Baying-for-Blood into an art-form. Another insipid defeat tomorrow would be like releasing a coiled spring of vitriol, and the hills will be alive with the sound of calls for the whole team to be sold, ‘Arry’s coaching staff sacked and football destroyed forever.

Place Your Bets

Darren Bent will score, ‘tis written in the stars.

 

As ever, all are most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the featured players in forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann hereY

ou can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, or follow on Twitter here

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Arsenal 3-0 Spurs: The Ghost of Gary Doherty

There would be something quintessentially Spurs about doing all the hard work and then gifting away the game on a plate, through one moment of madness.”

And sure enough…

 

It’s easy to forget that honours were fairly even in the early stages, as misplaced pass was matched by misplaced pass in a midfield absolutely jam-packed with bodies. While presumably not much of a spectacle to the neutral, we at least appeared relatively well organised. When called upon Gomes made a save that seemed to defy belief (it was suggested by one esteemed chum that Cudicini would not even have bothered trying to save it). It was not setting the world alight, but the game-plan was working.Thereafter however, all the worst elements of Tottenham Hotspur FC came to the fore. Once upon a time a balding, ginger loon patrolled our defence, permanently liable to produce something like an over-the-shoulder-volleyed-own-goal without warning; and yesterday was like revisiting the days of Gross, Francis and Gary Doherty, as madness infected half a dozen in lilywhite, each of whom could barely wait to give the self-destruct button a good old thump.

Schoolboy defending? Complete absence of off-the-ball movement? Early resort to the long-ball? Lack of passion, effort, fight? Truly, this was the Tottenham of old.

Schoolboy Defending

First goal: Eminently preventable. Sloppy defending in allowing the cross; Ledley of all people was second best when it arrived; and a touch disappointing for Gomes to be beaten on his near post.

Second goal: Where to start? Plain careless from Sergeant Wilson, while Hudd ought to be subjected to a public thrashing for simply chickening out of a challenge. And Ledley, Ledley, Ledley. Flying in was reckless at best, with further errors compounding an unusually shoddy display. I suppose in ten years he’s entitled to one bad game. Credit to Fabregas for taking it well, but no team with top-four aspirations ought to just melt away like that in the face of a one-man attack.

Third goal: Oh for goodness’ sake…

There could have easily have been others too, Gomes saving twice from Eduardo, as our back-four dubiously experimented with the world’s most ramshackle offside trap.

Complete Lack of Off-The-Ball Movement

 

We had plenty of possession, but whichever of our players found the ball at his feet would be offered precious few options, and as a result we were treated to the unholy sight of…

Early Resort To The Long-Ball

 

Lack of Passion, Effort, Fight

 

Moreover, if you don’t mind me banging a far older drum, these guys are paid shed-loads for their 90 minutes of work once or twice a week, so I demand to see them bust a gut each time they play, no matter what the score.

Patience Runs Out For Tow of AANP’s Favourite Sons

For what it’s worth, yesterday was also the straw that broke this camel’s back. The last vestige of patience has snapped at AANP Towers.

Jenas at least worked hard, but all the effort in the world does not mask the guy’s limitations as a central midfielder. And I can’t even be bothered to find a nice polite euphemism to describe Hudd’s performance. These two are simply not good enough if we want to challenge the top four (I suspect many will be tempted to tar the Barba-less Keane with this brush too). If we want to make the top six, beating the average Premiership fare en route, these chaps will do the job just fine. Our fixture-list in the coming months suggests presents a stretch of winnable games, and I suspect that Jenas and Hudd will trot out some decent performances in that time.

However, against Man Utd, Chelski and l’Arse they are not good enough. As long as they remain our first choices in central midfield, we will remain second-best against these teams.

Perspective

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As

ever, all are most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the players to be featured in forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann hereY

 

ou can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, or follow on Twitter here

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Spurs – Everton Preview: Premiership Points or Carling Cup?

If you enjoy those 15 half-time minutes when the subs come trotting out and half-heartedly ping the ball around, you’ll love tonight. Pav, Bentley, Hutton and Bale are all in line to start, as ‘Arry rings the changes with half an eye (in a manner of speaking) on Saturday’s game.

League or Cups? (Why Not Both?)

The absences of King, Woodgate, Lennon, Modric and Defoe force most of the changes upon us irrespective of the prioritising. The only optional changes ‘Arry is likely to make are in attack – where I suspect most of us would like to see Pav get his chance anyway – and in the full-back positions.

My tuppence worth is that I don’t particularly want to see Hutton and Bale in for Charlie and BAE at full-back. This has less to do with the quality of the personnel (I’m rather a fan of Bale as it happens) as the fact that our team is already mightily disrupted with all the injuries. Making unenforced changes on top of those is asking for trouble, particularly in defence, where in the absence of Ledley the players sometimes appear a little uncertain as to the names of the chaps alongside them. All members of our squad are capable Premiership-standard players, but make too many changes and the team’s performance could be as aimless as those half-time exercises.

I’ll be curious as to whether Sergeant Wilson starts. An injury or suspension to him really would give our squad for Saturday the look of a man who’s had his spine ripped from his body, something ‘Arry will presumably have taken into account. However, without him tonight we find ourselves looking towards the might of Jenas and Hudd to boss the game. Forgive me for feeling a little underwhelmed at the prospect, particularly as Tim Cahill in the opposition ranks will give us a glimpse of what we’re missing in central midfield. Still, after flattering to deceive against Stoke Jenas and Hudd owe us a good performance each.

So a rare opportunity for the squad players, and added responsibility on the shoulders of Dawson, Jenas, Hudd and Crouch. Not necessarily a line-up to have Everton quivering in their boots, but I’m pinning my hopes on home advantage seeing us through.

As

ever, all are most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the players to be featured in forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann here

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, or follow on Twitter here.

 

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Spurs-Stoke Preview: A Chance To Pay Tribute To Bill Nick

Believe it or not, win this by four goals and we’ll be top of the table, albeit until Chelski conclude their evening game. Try informing your nearest Spurs-supporting chum of this fact, and the chances are that you will be greeted with little more than a nod of approval and a healthy dose of perspective. Along with our consistency to date, the general realism of fans this season has been just as startling. We are all aware that we could be on the brink of something very, very good; but equally, there seems to be a healthy realisation that we remain a work in progress. That said, we’ll all be demanding three points today.Crouch Get His Chance

 

Crouch was snapped hurling down some slightly awkward-looking shapes after last Saturday’s game, and although the media did their best to sensationalise the “story” beyond all reasonable sense of perspective, they soon tired of that, particularly as ‘Arry treated it with little more than a shrug. I suspect it’s not what the continental players do, while rugby players apparently spend their post-match hours indulging in such unholy practices as sitting in ice-baths for reparatory purposes. Nevertheless, there seems no harm in a cheery night out with team-mates, a full week before the next game. Certainly the patrons of AANP Towers are in no position to judge a man who spends his Saturday nights on a London boogie floor…

Squad Depth. Ruddy Marvellous.

Woodgate should be back in the team today, for the first time this season. While Liverpool whinge about losing Gerrard and Torres (both of whom featured in their defeat at the Lane on the opening day of the season) it is a sign of the strength of our squad that despite the absences of Woodgate all season, Modric for half the season, and the likes of Ledley, Palacios, Dawson and Defoe at various points, we are deservedly in the top four.

So, aside from three points obviously, what would AANP like to see transpire from its lofty perch?

1. A Four-Goal Win To Take Us To The Top Of  The Premiership

Being top in August is fun but inane; being top when the clocks go back is, frankly, fantastic. ‘Tis true, ‘Arry would be unbearably smug if it transpires that he takes us from bottom to top in exactly a year, but I’d still give my right arm to see it happen.

2. Goals From Woodgate and Dawson

 

3. A Clean Sheet

 

4. A Blinder From Jenas/Hudd

 

5. A Tribute To The Great Bill Nicholson

 

I am sure the fans will pay tribute to him today, it is to be hoped that the club does likewise in some official capacity – and how fitting it would be if we could end the game sitting proudly atop the table once more, as Bill Nicholson took us as both player and manager.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As ever, all are

most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the players to be featured in forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann hereYou can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, or follow on Twitter here.

 

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Portsmouth 1-2 Spurs: Complicating the Uncomplicated

Not so much a game of two halves as a game of two thirds and a third third. We seemed to be cruising serenely after an hour or so – but then that wouldn’t be the Tottenham way, would it? Cue a wild thump of the self-destruct button, the halving of our lead and a daft sending off. The three points were eventually achieved in slightly nerve-jangling, harum-scarum style. Not for the first time I mused at the final whistle that Tottenham Hotspur ought to come with a health warning.Comedy Gold

The game could have been wrapped up within the first ten minutes, as Defoe might have a had a hat-trick. It rather set the tone, as we were the better team in the first half, and not for the first time the presence of Ledley at the back made a world of difference. A couple of weeks ago away to Bolton, in the absence of Ledley the back-four resembled a bunch of strangers – all of whom were mightily suspicious of the round white thing – but yesterday, particularly in the first half, he had things well under control. There was one scare, when a Corluka mistake left our back-four badly out of position, but let that not distract from the resulting moment of pure comedy gold from the Portsmouth forward Dindane, blasting over an open goal from a yard out, the sort of chance even Sandra Redknapp would have snaffled up.

Other than that, Pompey were reduced to long-range shots in the first half, mainly from Boateng, who seemed determined to have a crack every time he touched the ball, no matter the angle, distance or scientific impossibility. Ledley looked typically regal in rising to head home the opener, and as mentioned, we sailed through the first half pretty serenely.

Hudd and Jenas 

Jenas did not run the show as he might have done, but ‘twas notable that on the one occasion on which he burst forward he set up Defoe’s goal. There’s a salutary lesson in there – I would like to see Jenas gamble like that more often. Just take a chance man, break into the opposition area and see what happens.

Complicating The Uncomplicated

Two-nil, and cruising. In a parallel universe there’s a Tottenham team who achieve such positions and proceed to see out the game with minimal fuss and flawless professionalism. Their fortunes are charted on the Spurs blog Generous Amount of Action, Strong Understanding of Plot. Back on planet earth, with half an hour to go we did a fine job of complicating the uncomplicated. Portsmouth scored through Boateng, inevitably (seems a shame to criticise Gomes after he made some awesome saves, but he might have done better with the goal), and where once Defoe might have bitten an opponent’s arm, this time he trod on his leg, and saw red. No real complaints about the sending-off – not the most vicious challenge ever, but daft and petulant, leaving the ref with little option – and ruling Defoe out of the North London derby in a fortnight.

For five minutes thereafter we actually upped a gear, but it soon turned into a bit of an Alamo, with Dawson and Palacios thrown on for security, and the cheery sight of five added minutes of injury time. Gomes produced three top-drawer saves, the first in particular, from Kaboul’s deflected free-kick, looks better on every viewing, while we could also be thankful for another piece of truly comical finishing from the boy Dindane.

In the final analysis it is a strange game to summarise – on balance, when it was eleven against eleven we looked good value for a win, and yet we had to rely on three brilliant saves and two missed open-goals from Portsmouth. Having had the game in the bag at half-time, we almost let it slip through sloppiness and lack of self-discipline. However, despite going down to ten men away from home we didn’t capitulate, and a quarter of the way through the season we remain comfortably ensconced in the top four. Whisper it, but the 2009/10 Tottenham vintage is really rather tasty.

 

Chris Waddle is the latest player to be featured in the forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes, and you are invited to share your memories of him here. As ever, all are most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the other featured players: Cliff Jones here, Glenn Hoddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann here
(If you fancy following the progress of Spurs’ Cult Heroes you can do so on the Facebook fan group just about here)

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Portsmouth – Spurs Preview: The Worst-Case Scenario Unfolds

Well first the bad news. Sergeant Wilson is a likely absentee today after helping Honduras qualify for the World Cup Finals on Thursday. However, he carries possibly the best no-show excuse in the history of the game, as he is returning late on account of having been ordered to stay behind and party, by the country’s ruling military junta. Apparently this cheery lot are also responsible for kicking the President out of the country while he was still in his pyjamas, so when they you tell you to party you ruddy well crack open a beer and fondle a stripper.Apparently Palacios was only due to make it back to England this morning. When he turned up jet-lagged for the Man Utd game last month he ambled around in auto-pilot, picked up an early booking and was taken off at half-time, so he’s unlikely to feature today.

The Worst-Case Scenario Materialises. But It Should Be Ok This Time. 

Jenas has generally received positive reviews for his performances so far this season, notably against Burnley. Now as seasoned followers of this corner of the interweb will know, there is more chance of Hell freezing over than of AANP merrily awarding him gold stars, but certainly by his standards he’s started well this campaign. (There’s the rub, mind – he’s playing well by his standards, and Jermaine Jenas’ standards are Premiership-level, rather than Champions League or international quality… Sorry – I won’t get bogged down in this one again.) He’s generally kept things ticking over in midfield and retained possession sensibly enough, although his safety-first approach of backwards/sideways still grates, and I maintain that he still does not show the energy one would expect from a quality central midfielder. However, at the moment he is playing at a level good enough to see us through most regular Premiership fixtures, and while it may be insufficient against the top four, if he maintains that form he should help see us through today’s game.

Woodgate won’t return today, despite his recovery from injury, but blessed relief we have our Ledley back. For this alone I back us to win. His return carries the added bonus of allowing the Hudd to move back into midfield, in timely fashion too given Sergeant Wilson’s likely absence.

Friends Reunited 

Mercifully, somebody somewhere made sure that young Three-Touch O’Hara is ineligible for this one, so no need to worry there, and apparently the curiously-shaped ex-Spur Michael Brown is also in Pompey’s ranks these days. However, if anyone should worry about the return of former employees it ought to be the Pompey back-line, faced by a red-hot Defoe and Crouch, even if the latter is by no means guaranteed to start.

Pompey are propping up the table, although by all accounts they are playing far better than their position suggests. Nevertheless, excuses won’t be tolerated today dagnabbit – if we are serious about a top-six finish (and a quick, albeit unscientific poll reveals that we are) then nothing less than three points is acceptable today, particularly as AANP has global bragging rights at stake with its New Zealand-dwelling Pompey supporting chum. Scoring goals is no problem, and with Ledley back I fancy us to be fairly secure at the back.

 

Chris Waddle is the latest player to be featured in the forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes, and you are invited to share your memories of him here. As ever, all are most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the other featured players: Cliff Jones here, Glenn Hoddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann here

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Spurs – Bolton Preview: Knives Still Out For Keane

Still reeling from the shock revelation that the word “gullible” had been removed from the dictionary, we at AANP Towers were sent scrambling to our official panic stations yesterday as news of ‘Arry’s alleged departure spread like wildfire. The panic button was hit, the lights flashed and the stern lady kept announcing “This is not a drill”.Except it was. The irony of being strung along by an ultimately vacuous internet phenomenon is not lost on us at allactionnoplot.com.

Once we’d settled down and poured ourselves a few whiskies someone piped up to ask if this week’s episode of the surreal THFC All Action No Plot soap opera was going to feature a football match at any point. And as luck would have it…

Bolton May Chop Off Our Heads

Bolton away has traditionally been a worrying sight on the fixture-list. Always reminds me of that scene at the start of Gladiator when the messenger chap prances off on his horse with a message of goodwill to the uncouth barbarians – who respond by chucking his dismembered head back at Russell Crowe. I’ve always worried that we’ll try the fancy thing and they’ll hack us to pieces.

Fortunately however, the new improved Spurs circa 2009 has rather more fire in its belly, and has shown on a couple of occasions this season an ability to dig in and fight when the chips are down. Another win today would be further evidence of our ever-improving all-round game, and would reiniforce the growing belief that we belong amongst the loose pack of six or so atop the table. A win should be our target today.

Keane’s Critics, Defoe’s Mangled Hand 

Good heavens, exactly how hard was Defoe’s shot against Brian Jensen last week? He hit the ruddy thing with such force that after bouncing off the ‘keeper it flew back to complete mangle his hand, dislocating two fingers and breaking bones for good measure. I once had my wrist broken by a shot from a football, but that was a direct shot; this had rebounded off someone else yet was evidently still travelling. Couldn’t help wincing at the news that the Spurs staff were unable to pop his fingers back in at the time, the suggestion being that they tried and failed. Still, Defoe trained yesterday, which suggests that he’s in contention for today.

’Arry likes to select his forwards on a horses-for-courses basis, opting for the diddy-men last week to counter the big immobile Burnley centre-backs, so eyes are duly peeled for the approach adopted today.

Elsewhere 

A draw (remember them?) would not be a bad result, but we ought to set our sights higher today.

 

Glenn Hoddle is the latest Spurs great to be featured in the forthcoming book Spurs’ Cult Heroes, and you are invited to share your memories of him here. As ever, all are most welcome to leave memories – and browse those of others – regarding some of the featured players: Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jurgen Klinsmann here