All Action, No Plot

Like a craggily-bearded convict using the walls of his cell to chalk off the days until freedom, it is with growing excitement that I desecrate the walls of AANP Towers with scribbles signifying another game played, and another win recorded. Nine games to go, and our heroes are fulfilling their side of the bargain. I must confess that at this stage of the season I find myself caring less and less about the style, and more and more about the outcome. Spring has sprung and victories are now paramount, particularly with the injury-list lengthening.

Corluka’s Ridiculous Running Style: A Theorem

Not long ago I went for an unhealthily long run around the streets of North London, the result of which was that for the following two days the inevitably tight hamstrings had me waddling around like a man recently sodomized by a horse. The aftermath of said run gave rise to the notion that perhaps Coluka’s bizarrely laboured, trundling approach is due to the fact that the night before every game he sets off on a half-marathon, leaving him absolutely spent by the time he waddles out in lilywhite. Admittedly it is a hypothesis that might not necessarily withstand the most intense scrutiny, but with each passing game I gaze in utter bemusement at the sight of this top-level professional athlete undergoing such a struggle simply to run.

‘Twas a mixed performance from the Croatian. Now prevented from producing his wondrous link-up play with Lennon, I have taken to viewing the world’s oldest-looking 24 year-old with an increasingly critical eye. As ever his distribution was regularly sloppy; and, as ever, his defensive duties were carried out fairly solidly. On both counts however there was a notable exception today. His was a vital and superb contribution to the opening goal, the intelligent movement in the area and textbook downward header positively Sheringham-esque. Yet on the debit side his penalty area lunge in the first half was thoroughly ill-advised, and might have been deemed a spot-kick on another day.

And On The Subject of Penalty Shouts…

It appears that the impeccable Howard Webb would only have awarded Gareth Bale a penalty if the Blackburn mob had chopped him in half with a chainsaw. The handsome young Welshman was once again outstanding, with Sergeant Wilson also turning in another strong performance. Quite the bonus too that the midfield pitbull negotiated the full 90 minutes caution-free, to avoid an untimely two-game suspension.

Elsewhere on the Pitch

Modders showed a few flashes of class, but again could not really be said to have bossed things from central midfield. Similarly fitful stuff from Kranjcar, although it made a delightful change to see us actually score from a corner, the Croatian’s set-piece delivery on that occasion achieving the rare feat of beating the first man.

Super Pav

Actually “Super” is something of an exaggeration, as on two occasions he swung at the ball with all the mal-coordination of a fat kid in the playground, from not much further than six yards. However, when you’re hot you’re hotski, and our Pav still chipped in with his now customary brace. If nothing else it will bump up his transfer value come the summer.

Is There A “Bad Time To Score”?

Good predatory stuff from Defoe too, to celebrate the return of the Wembley arch atop his pate. Conventional wisdom has it that the closing moments of the first half are “a good time to score”, and whatever the science of that particular theory a half-time lead is always well-received around these parts, for our lot have developed the laudable habit of turning such half-time leads into full-time victories.

Perhaps not vintage Spurs in the final analysis, but a job well done nevertheless. With resources depleted it is quite a relief to shake hands, turn on our heels and wander off into the sunset with three points securely stuffed in our cases. It is three successive League wins now, precisely the adrenaline shot our top-four push required, and with seven days until our next fixture our walking-wounded have some precious time to remove their band-aids and bolster the ranks.

AANP’s first book, Spurs’ Cult Heroes, is now available in the Spurs shop, all good bookshops and online (at Tottenhamhotspur.com, as well as WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play).

All are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding the players featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here. Also featured in the book are Sandy Brown and the late, great Bill Nicholson.

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, follow on Twitter here

Strangely nervous ahead of this one, precisely because we are such overwhelming favourites. We at AANP Towers would happily trade all of the following for three points, in any way or form, but as I idle away the final minutes of the day-job, the following notions float to mind…

A Dull Home Win

The list of Games-To-Rue-Come-May is far too long already; let’s not add to it, eh chaps? Just a standard, by-the-numbers, mundane home win will do just fine thank you. You know the sort – a goal from Kranjcar in the first 15 minutes; a good hour of dominance; a slightly nervy feel that we ought to turn said dominance into goals; and finally a Defoe goal in the last ten minutes to kill the game off. The sort of regular home win that gets shunted well done the Match of the Day running order. No alarms and no surprises, as Radiohead might venture.

A nice stress-free win is all the more appealing given that our fixture-list begins to take a few turns for the worse in coming weeks. Admittedly Pompey at home should just about be negotiable, but Stoke away could be a tad tricky; Man City away could be crucial; and we also have games against the top three to come. Three points are being dangled White Hart Lane-wards, and it might be an idea to stock up now, before such resources become scarce in April.

No Caution For Palacios

One more yellow and Sergeant Wilson misses two games. Bad enough at the best of times, the current injury crisis means that one more mishap might see Kaboul or Corluka shoved into midfield, as part of a tactical re-jig best defined as Close-Your-Eyes-And-Hope. The chances of Palacios lasting the final ten Premiership (plus Cup) games without a booking are nil, but if he could just hold out until the likes of Hudd and Bentley return that would soften the blow somewhat.

Destruction of All That Sam Allardyce Stands For

Sam Allardyce might be quite the philanthropist - on a personal level I cannot comment - but as a manager I despise him and his ways. ‘Arry has gone the diplomatic route ahead of this game (“Everyone plays how they play, they have their own style…Whatever Sam does, he has been one of the most successful managers”) but I fervently hope that we subject Allardyce’s charges to a masterclass of one-touch, olé football, and pass them to death. Although I’ll settle for a mundane home win of course.

None of That Hollywood-Ball Gubbins From Daws

Daws’ defensive form has been pretty darned impressive, barring the occasional rush of blood to the head, but I do wish he would stop the Beckenbauer impressions. Just be a good boy and knock the ball short to Modders or someone, rather than trying to launch it sixty yards to one of the attacking midgets.

Robbo Circa 2008 Onwards

Once upon a time Paul Robinson was awesome. A few years back, when we were last challenging for the top four, it seemed that between him and Ledley a certain goal would be prevented every game, and I duly worshipped his balding pate. However, ever since that missed kick against Croatia it has been nigh on impossible to think of him without seeing the grinning face of Borat heralding another slapstick mishap, poor blighter. More of the same tomorrow please. Let’s see him flap at a 30-yard Kranjcar effort, or flap at a set-piece and end up chucking the ball into his own net.

Up the other end, Gomes has barely made a mistake all season, and this juxtaposition alone ought to be enough to seal the three points.

The teamsheet will presumably be fairly similar to that posted against Fulham last week – BAE at left-back; Bale left midfield; Modders in the centre – although Defoe can be expected to return to the starting line-up alongside Pav. The early kick-off gives us a chance to put a bit of pressure on the other challengers for fourth, and watch them stew in their own juices over the course of the weekend – and there are few preferable activities around these parts of a Saturday afternoon.

AANP’s first book, Spurs’ Cult Heroes, is now available in the Spurs shop, all good bookshops and online (at Tottenhamhotspur.com, as well as WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play).

All are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding the players featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here. Also featured in the book are Sandy Brown and the late, great Bill Nicholson.

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, follow on Twitter here

Well I would have settled for a draw beforehand – that it was such a memorable, high-octane, pulsating spectacle of a game was a bonus. As against Bolton in the last round, the AANP view is that our opponents have blown their best chance of victory by failing to beat us on their own patch. Back at the Lane and under the floodlights I fancy us to come out on top, injuries permitting. Fulham at home and Pompey at Wembley in order to make the FA Cup Final? Now there’s a thought…

A Good Day For Bullies

It’s not big and it’s not clever, but it appears that sometimes bullies finish first. Sergeant Wilson refused to let anyone have their way, and spent his 90 minutes ruining things for any Fulham player who came near him; while for the other lot, Bobby Zamora made himself a complete pain from start to finish. The well-behaved kids, like Modders, didn’t stand a chance. Too nice by half, our Luka was given the opportunity to boss things from central midfield, but again gave reason to conclude that he is best deployed as a left midfielder, drifting infield and linking with an overlapping full-back.

A Nagging Worry

There remains a nagging frustration here at AANP Towers that the central midfield berth remains an area for improvement generally. I humbly suggest that Hudd needs to offer more than just his passing-range; and less humbly decree Jenas a lost cause; while as we saw yesterday Modders does not appear to have the requisite muscle and feistiness for the role. Until the end of the season we will have to plough on with the resources we have, but come the summer I fervently hope that we beg, steal or borrow a top-notch, attack-minded central midfielder. Admittedly there are precious few of them out there, and ‘Arry will probably just persist with Hudd, but to become a Champions League-standard team we need a midfielder who can run the show.

Bale’s Midfield Adventure

Back to yesterday’s game, about which many a sage has ventured that a draw seemed about right. Our heroes started fairly well, but by golly the Fulham defence was well-organised, and within about fifteen minutes I had already started mentally clearing the diary for the replay date. The game became a little more stretched in the second half, with Fulham hitting upon the novel idea of trying to win the thing, and Gomes was called upon to go leaping around once or twice, but the closest thing to a goal was probably Corluka’s coronary-inducing slashed clearance in the dying embers of the game, which drifted horrifyingly close to his own net.

As ever, all that was best from our lot came from the ever-wondrous size nines of Gareth Bale. Worries that his creative juices might be sapped by his new midfield role proved fairly unfounded, as he increasingly became our default attack option – the only man capable of getting behind the Fulham defence, frequently drawing two opponents towards him and occasionally also haring infield. I’m not sure too many women want him, or too many men want to be him, but I have a healthy dose of man-love for the guy, and sincerely hope that his every whim is indulged by those in authority at the Lane, to ensure he remains in lilywhite for years to come. Every now and then I allow myself to drift off and imagine how ruddy unstoppable we might be with Bale pelting down one flank and a fit-again Aaron Lennon on the other…

Elsewhere On The Pitch

Less impressive were our two full-backs. Assou-Ekotto was a little too casual at times, while not for the first time Corluka’s distribution was rather wayward. Bassong however probably deserves a nod of approval, for sticking manfully to his Zamora-containment duties throughout, a blinking hard task by the look of it.

The Crouch-Pav pairing did not really have me slapping my thigh and ordering champagne. There was huffing and puffing a-plenty up-front, but not too many clear-cut chances amidst the suffocating line of Fulham defenders.

So a replay it will be. We may yet rue failure to capitalise upon the absence of Danny Murphy in the Fulham ranks, and there is also the very ominous possibility that injury or suspension might deplete our midfield further; but as things stand we are jolly well-placed to reach the FA Cup Final.

AANP’s first book, Spurs’ Cult Heroes, is now available in the Spurs shop, all good bookshops and online (at Spurs’ Cult Heroes, is now available in the Spurs shop, all good bookshops and online (at Tottenhamhotspur.com, as well as WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play).

All are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding the players featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here. Also featured in the book are Sandy Brown and the late, great Bill Nicholson.

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, follow on Twitter here

‘Arry might already have the world’s largest backroom staff, but at the moment the most useful person to have snuggled up between Joe Jordan Kevin Bond might be Florence Nightingale. Instead, we appear to have hired Darren Anderton’s personal physician. Lennon, Bentley, Hudd and even the Lord of all things Sideways and Backwards are each out injured, meaning it will be the bare bones in lilywhite across the midfield today.

Our Makeshift Midfield – Actually Quite Tasty

However, as bare bones go, a midfield of Bale-Palacios-Modric-Kranjcar is still pretty blinking impressive. BAE should move seamlessly back into the team at left-back, meaning Gareth Bale will be shunted forward to left midfield. The handsome young Welshman is certainly capable of playing the more attacking role, but part of the reason for his success as attacking full-back has been that the midfielder ahead of him has cut inside giving him a passage down which to overlap from deep. It will be a slightly different role today, but he still seems a good bet to cause mischief.

Modders will therefore presumably take the central midfield berth, with Sergeant Wilson playing the role of his big burly minder, which would leave Kranjcar, fresh from wonder-goal exploits with Croatia, as right winger. It all sounds quite marvellous actually – pace, trickery and silky-smooth passing all served up on a bed of Honduran snarl – but the crucially sobering proviso is that one more injury and we’re quite possibly doomed.

Not just tomorrow either – the return dates for Messrs Hudd, Bentley, Lennon et al are several weeks off, so if our top-four Premiership push is not also to be derailed the four who start across the midfield today will need to be carefully encased in cotton wool and that bubble-wrap stuff the minute the final whistle sounds. And if that sounds dramatic have a perusal of our subs’ bench this afternoon, likely to feature the likes of Dervite, Rose, Livermore and Townsend. All enthusiastic young bucks I’m sure, but probably not the chaps upon whom we want to pin our top-four hopes.

Peter Crouch, International Superstar

In typically restrained fashion various tabloids have been heralding Crouch as the saviour of England’s World Cup campaign. All well and good but his niche at the Lane is as Plan B. Natterings in certain quarters yesterday suggested that Defoe might have tweaked something in the line of international duty, but only such an injury ought to split up the Defoe-Pav partnership. Much more of the Russian’s net-bulging antics and plans might have to be made to iron his 12 letters across the back of next season’s lilywhite shirt. For the time-being however he is one of the in-form strikers in the country, and a good bet for a goal at some point today. It might not be the world’s most complete striking partnership, but Defoe and Pav are two of the best goalscorers around at the moment.

Fulham, particularly on their own patch, are a tough bunch of nuts to crack, but even with injuries we ought to be able to grab at least a draw from this (and I certainly fancy our chances in a replay against this lot at the Lane).

AANP’s first book, Spurs’ Cult Heroes, is now in shops – and Gary Mabbutt, the last man to lift the FA Cup for Spurs, will be signing copies of the book at Waterstones in Enfield, today, from 12 – 2pm. If you prefer the comfort of your computer-box, the humble tome can also be purchased at Spurs’ Cult Heroes, is now in shops – and Gary Mabbutt, the last man to lift the FA Cup for Spurs, will be signing copies of the book at Waterstones in Enfield, today, from 12 – 2pm. If you prefer the comfort of your computer-box, the humble tome can also be purchased at Tottenhamhotspur.com, as well as WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play

All are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding the players featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here. Also featured in the book are Sandy Brown and the late, great Bill Nicholson.

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, follow on Twitter here

It was just like old times, those sepia-tinged, heady days of late-summer 2009, when rubbish teams would traipse up to the Lane and be promptly destroyed, with our heroes requiring nothing beyond second gear. From the outset the only worry last night was that we might fail to turn domination into goals, but merrily this was not to be one of those wretched occasions. A job well done, and without breaking sweat.

Madness I Tell Ye

The evening began in thoroughly perplexing fashion, with the announcement that Assou-Ekotto was back in the team as well as the boy Bale. Completely discombobulated, AANP and chums frantically bandied around hypotheses in an effort to get our heads around the madness. Were we about to witness 3-5-2? Or Bale as a left-winger? Or a novel – if highly illegal – use of 12 players from the outset?

As it turned out it was nothing more outlandish than BAE at right-back. Some newfangled concept known as “squad rotation” apparently (it will never catch on). We have perhaps been a little spoiled by the frequent gallops, up the length of the pitch and back, by our handsome young Welshman, and last night was a reminder that the braided one is a little more restrained in his attacking forays, but it was still good to see him back in the fold. His reluctance to bomb on and inability to use his right foot had a rather detrimental effect upon poor old Bentley, who through little fault of his own was rendered fairly ineffective, but as events transpired this was no huge loss.

Pav Still Super

The other notable selection was, of course, Pav up-front. It is perhaps a little premature to laud him to the heavens and name the new stadium after him, but in one and a bit games he has done all that could possibly have been expected of him, and certainly looks sharper in front of goal than Crouch ever did. The AANP jury is out on whether he and Defoe qualify alongside Sheringam-Klinsmann, Greaves-Gilzean and Bert-Ernie in the ranks of The World’s Greatest Ever Double-Acts, but while their partnership is hardly telepathic, it has nevertheless now become difficult to drop either.

Daws And Palacios’ Passing Master-Class

”You don’t know what it’s like to really create something; to create a life; to feel it growing inside you. All you know how to create is death and destruction…”

So said Sarah Connor – a little scarily, truth be told – in the thoroughly magnificent Terminator 2, and they are pearls of wisdom which might well be thrown each week at Daws and Sergeant Wilson. Both are tip-top when it comes to destruction – Palacios charging after ball-bearing opponents like a rabid sniffer-dog, and Daws seemingly yet to lose a header this season. However, once they’ve won the ball I close my eyes and offer a silent prayer, because the chances are they will deliver it straight back to the opposition.

As it happened though, the rather glorious exception to this yesterday was Palacios’ hand in the second goal, a delightful pass into the danger-zone. As with Bale in the second half, it is easy to chuckle at the buffoonery of the opposition for scoring own-goals, but let us not overlook the cracking delivery of the passes from Palacios and Bale, into areas against which it is jolly difficult to defend.

The All-Star Hollywood Midfield

Amusingly, ‘Arry came over all Ocean’s Eleven in the second half, and decided to cram as many silky superstars as possible into the team, with complete disregard for such ugly notions as tackle and bite. Thus it transpired that Sergeant Wilson was withdrawn, and we were treated to possibly our prettiest midfield ever, ball-players of the ilk of Modders, Hudd, Kranjcar, Gudjohnsen and Bentley alongside one another. It ought to have made for 20 minutes of the world’s most beautiful football, but by then the game was over and they just went through the motions. Rather a shame actually.

Gudjohnsen

Or Sheringham Mk II, if you prefer. He has no real inclination to go sprinting hither and thither, but with those little flicks and disguised diagonal passes he’s clearly far too laid-back for any such plebeian exertion as running. Not sure how he would cope in the hurly-burly of a high-octane Premiership fight to the death, but as a fourth striker he seems a welcome addition to the squad. He adds something very different; will be of value in games in which our front-men find themselves isolated; is of sufficient quality to give one of the other forwards a breather as fixtures pile up (there’s that crazy “squad rotation” concept once more); and adds some much-needed experience to what is generally a young squad.

Elsewhere On The Pitch

More attacking wondrousness from our Bale, again neatly glossing over his occasional defensive deficiency. Another watertight performance from Gomes. It would be easy to ignore, but he shot-stopped and punched impeccably, and made a particularly smart save at 2-0 just before half-time, which might otherwise have made things jittery. Sergeant Wilson became the first Latin American footballer in history to fail to execute perfectly a back-heel. The boy Rose looked good, if one-footed. And so on; we did the bare minimum, and it was more than enough. Fulham away is not easy, but eminently do-able, and suddenly…

[Shameless plug alert] Victory last night means that we’ll be in the Quarter Finals on Saturday 6^th March – and also means that Gary Mabbutt’s signing of Spurs’ Cult Heroes, that same day in Enfield Waterstones, is brought forward to 12 noon.

Spurs’ Cult Heroes, will be in shops from 6 March - but is available to pre-order now from Tottenhamhotspur.com, as well as WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, follow on Twitter here

And as ever, all are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding some of the players to be featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here

Just picking an entirely arbitrary number, it’s AANP’s (by no means exhaustive) nine-point wish-list for this afternoon’s trip to Wigan…

1. Same Old Same Old From Gomes

Watching l’Arse goalkeeper Lucas Fabianski pass his Three Stooges audition with flying colours this week gave a pleasant reminder that, for all our problems at the other end, between the sticks we are well-blessed. In generations to come AANP’s grandchildren will gather around and listen with disbelieving ears at tales of how calamitous Gomes was in his early days, but mercifully such an age is long passed.  The big Brazilian has been one of our best performers this season, and at the end of a week in which even such goalkeeping luminaries as Shay Given and Brad Friedel have erred rather prominently, it is good to know that our last line of defence is so secure. More of the same this afternoon please.

2. Domineering Performance From Hudd

Whatever the varying opinions of his contributions, it is beyond dispute that Hudd is first-choice centre-midfielder – so let’s see him play like one. Every week. All the best players have occasional off-days, but the big lad’s are far too frequent. Wigan away might not necessarily be the jolliest of cake-walks, but a central midfielder at a top-four team ought to dominate such fare.

3. Score The Next Ruddy Penalty We Are Awarded

Even if Sandra herself steps up, for goodness’ sake show some confidence and bury the blasted thing. It has been damningly suggested in various quarters that our heroes’ lack of mettle from 12 yards is indicative of a broader mentality throughout the team, a mentality that decrees we fail to beat inferior teams and choke at the sight of fourth place.

4. Give Us Back Our Modric

He’s been a changed man since returning from injury. It is understandable I suppose, but there appears to be an added timidity, and he is being muscled out of games before he has a chance to shine.

5. Law of the Ex

Sergeant Wilson is up against his former employers today, which typically is a signal for the man in question to get on the scoresheet, but I think we would settle for a goalless-but-imperious performance from our much-loved pitbull. His snap appears to be returning, and although his distribution is more often than not awry the good is outweighing the bad once more. Should Wigan spoil for a fight today, Palacios is the man to whom we will look to return the punches.

6. Striking Alternative

They are decent enough, but the Crouch-Defoe partnership does not really have anyone leaping off their seat and shrieking with joy unconfined. Murmurs of Pav returning to the fold at some point over the next week may just be mischievous ‘Arry-talk, but the prospect of the Russian linking with Defoe has an exciting ring to it.

7. The Return of Lennnon

Whispers had suggested that he may be up and running at some point this afternoon, although it now seems another week on the sidelines beckons. Not to denigrate the efforts of D. Bentley Esquire, but the absence of Lennon has been rather keenly felt. As there is a danger that we may be attaching a smidgeon too much weight upon his tiny little shoulders, for the moment I am content with the modest assumption that his return will instantly transform us into a free-scoring, irrepressible, non-stop attacking juggernaut, on a par with Brazil 1970, set to embark upon a 10-game winning streak that comfortably ensures a top-four finish. (In much the same way as I assumed that the return from injury of Modders, a month or so ago, would have a similar impact.) Should Lennon return and prove himself to be anything less than a shaven-eyebrowed Messiah there will be some deeply-furrowed brows around AANP Towers.

8. Turn Up at Kick-Off

Not least to fulfil the Sky TV obligations, but it would also be jolly nice if our heroes got stuck in from the off. As fully-paid professionals, trained for nothing else since childhood, it strikes me as mildly curious that they need to be reminded of their duties at half-time (as last week at Bolton). Pick up where we left off last week and things should turn out just peachy, but another classic AWOL first-half from Tottenham could leave us in that oh-so-familiar position of having to hammer relentlessly at a ten-man defence before trudging home with tails between legs.

9. Three Points

By hook, crook or penalties. Forget nine goals, just one more than the other lot will suffice. The momentum has disappeared from our season in the manner of a Jenas forward burst, pause, about-turn and backwards pass; but we are still very much in touch with the top-four chasers, and our current malady is nothing a little string of wins would not cure.

AANP’s first book, Spurs’ Cult Heroes, will be in shops from 6 March - but is available to pre-order now from Tottenhamhotspur.com, as well as WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, follow on Twitter here

And as ever, all are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding some of the players to be featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here

Frustrating stuff. A couple of months ago I was fairly sanguine about points dropped at home, reasoning with sage, Yoda-like calm that as long as we kept playing well the goals and wins would eventually follow. Never folk to take decisive action if we could get away with thrusting our heads into the sand and waiting, we at AANP Towers reasoned that there was no need to panic - the problem would take care of itself.

Not so, it appears. Week after week we seem to turn in a strong performance but draw a blank, and as well as making for an unhappy trek down the High Road this is now beginning to derail the top-four push. The notion of turning White Hart Lane into a fortress seems to have been wildly misunderstood by our heroes, currently labouring under the misapprehension that it requires clean sheets for both sides. Future visitors to the Lane include Everton, Blackburn, Bolton and Pompey (as well as l’Arse and Chelski), and more ten-man lock-outs are on the agenda.

The team of monkeys here at AANP Towers has been hard at work brainstorming ideas as to what the devil we are doing wrong at the moment. And so, in no particular order…

Not Playing Good Football?

Mercifully we need not worry on this count. The standard of football remains high, the performance on Saturday varying between good and downright blinking excellent. Which leads me to wonder whether we need…

Luck?

I don’t subscribe to this view. Sometimes we get lucky (Bentley’s deflected free-kick against Fulham) and sometimes we don’t (Myhill’s heroics in goal for Hull) but failure to score at home to Wolves, Hull, Stoke and Villa is due to more than just bad luck. That said, on another day we might have been awarded a late penalty for the challenge on Defoe (although even if awarded I’m sure it would have been promptly saved).

A Different Forward-Line?

Controversial perhaps, as the problem seems to be that the opposition penalty area is just too darned crowded these days before we even get the ball to the front-two. Defoe’s raison d’être is simply to put the ball in the net when given a chance, and few are better at the art. Crouch has his limitations, but he had a decent enough game on Saturday, winning his fair share of headers and holding it up, giving us the option of the aerial route. As a combination, the pair work fairly well. However, I wouldn’t mind seeing Gudjohnsen given a chance to stretch his legs, and provide something a little different in attack, especially in those games in which the opposition back-line looks to have the measure of us.

A Dribbler?

C’est possible. A man who can produce a bit of trickery to take on two or three opponents might help to drag out of position those well-drilled defences that seem to be formed of row after row of resolute bodies. Whether we actually have any such player is a fresh problem. Taarabt and Giovani both had a few stepovers and nutmegs in their respective repertoires, but neither is around. Kranjcar occasionally gets his head down and weaves in and out, and as such is probably the best dribbler left at the club.

Lennon?

Bentley is doing a good job, but when it comes to Aaron Lennon, as that closely-cropped lady from the 80’s used to warble, nothing compares. For all the neat passing and technical ability, our team lacks pace. At the moment, opponents seem able to line themselves up in formation and repel. A burst of pace would help us actually get behind them and have a dig at their soft underbelly. Bale on the left gives glimpses of the panic this can cause in opposition ranks, always looking threatening when he hares down to the by-line.

Such hastily garnered suggestions are unlikely to go down in history as the footballing equivalent of neurosurgery, but are a selection of the wonderings swimming around the AANP mind. More pertinently, what solutions can ‘Arry provide? He may have assembled a coaching team to cover every eventuality, but, worryingly, after each shut-out he seems to repeat the same line, at least publicly, that he could not have asked any more of the players, and that they tried everything they could. Almost, one might suggest, as if he himself is out of ideas as to how to win these games. If only he had had a couple of capable and creative substitutes to whom he could have turned on Saturday…

A Grumble About Substitutes

It seemed a little strange that ‘Arry did not look to the bench for some fresh attacking inspiration. Retaining the on-pitch status quo would have made sense if all were going to plan and we were romping home, but circumstances rather strongly suggested that a case could have been made for a change or two. Each of Hudd, Modders and Bentley were performing fairly well without ever scything open the massed ranks of Villa defenders, yet Kranjcar and Gudjohnsen were left to twiddle their thumbs on the bench.

And while I’m having a grumble, here’s another point that struck me on Saturday - our ratio of goals-scored-from-corners to corners-taken must be appalling. The statistic, whatever it is, is all the worse for the fact that we have a whole army of big, sturdy six-footers marching forward for each corner these days.

Elsewhere On The Pitch

An honourable mention to Gomes, now one of the finest ‘keepers around. A cracking double-save in the first half crowned yet another solid all-round performance, secure on crosses and always keen to prompt attacks hastily. Sergeant Wilson showed again that his bite seems to be returning, but his doings when actually in possession remain erratic. There was also another good showing from the handsome young Welshman on the left on Saturday, doing all that was required defensively as well as offering his usual potency in attack.

So yet again we have to rely this week upon other sides to do us favours. Hull, unbelievably, obliged, turning over Man City, but Liverpool have, for this weekend at least, capitalised upon our failing. I still cannot see Villa lasting the pace in the race for fourth. Utterly bereft of attacking ideas, it seems the principal reason they remain in the hunt at present is their goalkeeper, the ever-magnificent Brad Friedel. However, we ought to be capable of stringing together a run of wins that would render academic the form of our rivals. A draw against Villa, while disappointing, is not calamitous, and the blow would be softened by a few consecutive wins in future weeks.

AANP’s first book, Spurs’ Cult Heroes, comes out in early March and is now available to pre-order from WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, follow on Twitter here

And as ever, all are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding some of the players to be featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here

In between various planes and trains back from Morocco I managed to catch yesterday’s goings-on at Elland Road, and jolly heartening they were too. One of my brothers, for whom the rigours of parenthood mean that Spurs-watching is less frequently indulged in these days, texted afterwards to note that, as the first full Spurs game he has seen in around a year, he was pleasantly surprised by our performance. He has a point, for it was an all-round performance of the sort to which we have grown accustomed in recent months - general neatness in possession, while creating a healthy number of chances. It is perhaps easy to lose sight of this amidst the frustrations of umpteen missed chances and haemorrhaged Premiership points, but on the whole these days we play an extremely attractive brand of football, and progress over the last 12 months has been exceptional.

Interesting to reflect on how the team has evolved even within the space of half a season, partly through accident and partly through design. Having shot out of the traps back in August with Modric, Keane, Lennon and BAE in the ranks, last night we eased through with Kranjcar, Bale and Bentley each looking impressive. Whisper it, but recent weeks have shown that there really is a degree of squad-depth there, albeit still with a few bad apples in the White Hart Lane barrel.

This article, forwarded to me today by a particularly highly-regarded Spurs-supporting chum, makes the point that much of our progress has been due simply to the improvement of quality, on a player-for-player basis, over the last year or two. To borrow from the article:

Jermain Defoe is a better version of Darren Bent, Wilson Palacios is a better version of Didier Zokora, and the Spurs boss feels that Gudjohnsen is a better version of Keane.

The Reason Behind Bentley’s Resurgence?

Bentley’s attitude in recent weeks has been admirable. Cynics may suggest that his motivation is personal rather than team-oriented, and personally I reckon his lip has been quivering with rage ever since Kranjcar arrived to steal his crown as Team Pretty-Boy, but whatever the reason I hugely approve of his approach. He has put his head down, slapped on even larger amounts of hair-gel and worked hard, producing decent quality both when delivering crosses and when cutting infield. He is by no means the finished article, and the smart-money remains on him heading elsewhere in the summer, but it is good to see him rising to the challenge.

Defoe

Another hat-trick from Defoe has apparently prompted debate in some quarters as to whether or not the little Meister is actually no more than what those of a cricketing bent refer to as a flat-track bully, only capable of producing the goods against the whipping boys of the game. (It should be born in mind that this particular point was framed within the context of whether he should spearhead England’s attack at the World Cup, not a topic with which I am entirely concerned at this juncture.)

Statistics could probably be reeled out to counter the “flat-track bully” claim (and from memory I can pick his goal against Man Utd earlier this season and a harshly-disallowed goal at Anfield, as well as a blinding strike against l’Arse a few years ago as examples of strikes against the top-four) but the little drum I’ll bang here is that even if he is deemed no more than a tormentor of English football’s less-refined urchins this is nevertheless a mighty handy quality to have at a club with Top-Four and trophy aims. Long may it continue. Given our struggles this season against those sides we ought to be demolishing, the occasional Defoe hat-trick against a weak defence is quite welcome, and if the moniker best describing him is that of “flat-track bully” that elicits little more than a shrug.

Honourable Mentions

Bale continues to impress, particularly when charging northwards, while Daws, bless him, continues to give heart and soul every game. He is not the perfect defender, but those inspirational performances are becoming increasingly frequent. Hard to believe that only a few months ago there was some talk of him heading up to Sunderland.

Less Honourably

Oh that the rest of them would show his attitude. It was a good, controlled and largely intelligent performance, so there are not too many complaints, but the age-old gripe with Tottenham Hotspur remains, that few in the team give the appearance of being ready to strain every last sinew for the cause. Daws, of course, does just this; and as noted above Bentley’s attitude in recent weeks has been pleasing. Defoe as well looks genuinely frustrated every time he misses an opportunity.

Some of the others however, still appear stuck permanently within cruise control. He probably can’t help it, but by smiling and sticking out his tongue each time he misses a chance Crouch gives the impression that settling for second-best is not a problem. Tottenham players should be cursing, swearing and ready to kill with their bare hands when they miss chances or concede goals, and by golly they should be busting a gut to make sure it does not happen again. In short, we need to see them reacting on the pitch with the same passion we show in the stands.

Jenas

Really, what’s the point?

Spurs Are On Their Way To Wembley

It was only Leeds, but it might have been a lot worse. Many Spurs teams of yore would have started timidly yesterday, given the venue and the weather, but to their credit our lot played well for all but the ten minutes or so prior to half-time. Removing foot from throttle after taking the lead does not rank too highly on the list of The World’s Greatest Sporting Ideas, but that aside it was a pretty professional performance. A nod of approval too for the none-too-subtle attitude towards closing out the game in the final minutes, all and sundry displaying a quite stoic determination to head for the corners and run the clock down. Bolton away is tricky but winnable – a description one might pin to the tournament as a whole.

AANP’s first book, Spurs’ Cult Heroes, comes out on 16 Feb and is now available to pre-order from WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play

And as ever, all are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding some of the players to be featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here

Really not sure how to call this one. Back in August I would have pencilled in Birmingham away as a solid point and a good chance for all three, but it’s a different kettle of fish here in January 2010. Our win over Fulham was bizarrely comfortable, but hardly suggested that the Tottenham juggernaut is revved up to full throttle, ready to blitz aside all-comers.

Birmingham for their part had been unbeaten in about five years until they were soundly despatched by Chelski midweek, so no obvious indication as to how they will amble up either. This will be no stroll in the park, but a stirring performance from our lot would not be too much to ask, and a convincing win at St Andrews would give us a most welcome second-wind going into spring. Of course, the alternative, of an insipid, uninspired defeat, would be the cue for the voices of doom to bellow forth their scathing critique once again.

With neither the signings of Gudjohnsen nor Kaboul confirmed as yet I presume there will be a fairly familiar look about the team tomorrow. Bassong for Ledley; Bentley to return no-man’s land (presuming Kranjcar has recovered from his sniffles); a choice of Crouch or Keane in attack. Defoe has been relatively quiet in recent weeks, but I sneer in the face of the man/woman who dismisses his goal-threat. He may not have had many chances recently, but the lob against Leeds and disallowed goal against Liverpool suggest that he has not forgotten where the netting is moored.

Sergeant Wilson has given a few encouraging indications over the past seven days that he may be returning to form, and away from home his will be an important role. As will that of the boy Bale. Speed on the counter-attack always helps on our travels, and with Lennon’s “two-week” groin strain now a month-long absence our primary pace outlet appears to be the reborn left-back. However, Bale has yet to be particularly given a severe test defensively since returning to the starting line-up, and tomorrow might be an occasion on which that side of his game is of primary importance.

In a season in which all the pretenders for fourth are resolutely taking one step back after every two steps forward, a run of four or five consecutive wins would do us a world of good. With Villa at home and Wigan away to follow, opportunity knocks for our heroes tomorrow.

AANP’s first book, Spurs’ Cult Heroes, comes out on 16 Feb and is now available to pre-order from WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, follow on Twitter here

And as ever, all are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding some of the players to be featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here

Curiouser and curiouser. You think you’ve seen it all at the Lane, you brace yourself for the worst – and are then treated to a completely serene, straightforward, almost routine home win, as far removed from the All-Action-No-Plot mentality as is possible.

It Was The Midfield What Won It

Ledley and Daws were generally rock-solid (the latter a little excitable, in his unique, loveable way) and at the other end Defoe barely touched the ball; but in the middle we held the upper hand, player-for-player and as a unit. It helped I suppose that Fulham seemed content to play for time even when 2-0 down. Their short passes and games of keep-ball were pretty but spectacularly inoffensive, all that non-threatening sideways passing making them look like an entire team of Jermaine Jenases, God help them. While far from perfect, our lot won by being less Jenas-like, mixing ball-retention with the odd moment of sparkle going forward. Not the perfect performance by any means, but sufficient, and they all played their part.

Hudd

Seasoned AANP followers will be aware that while happy to offer the guy polite applause, I have yet to become a fully paid-up member of the Tommy Hudd Fan Club, and I was a tad dubious on hearing his name read out yesterday. Need not have worried however. For a start, he took to the pitch sporting a haircut vaguely akin to Mr T, which is always a good move in my book. He then began the game with a confidence and willingness to take charge which he has occasionally lacked in home games this season (Man Utd and Hull, off the top of my head). From the off he constantly demanded the ball, kept things ticking over briskly and stung the ‘keeper’s palms. We like that around these parts. He could also be seen to hassle and harry – not exactly in a bone-crunching Sergeant Wilson sort of way, but showing enough willing and energy to hurry along the opposition. AANP happily awards him a doughnut by way of reward.

Sergeant Wilson

His actual distribution of the little orb bordered on woeful, but the snarl and bite was commendable. Still not at the standard of last season, but this was one of his better days of the current campaign.

Modders

Words cannot do justice to my man-love for the little chap. His contribution to the first goal summed him up really – a determination to win the ball when too many in lilywhite over the years would have watched it bounce out of play with a shrug; then a piece of skill in setting up Crouch that simply would not have occurred to a mere mortal. There are no airs or graces, he just does what he does for love of football then fiddles with his hair and starts again. The romantic in me had hoped that his switch to centre-midfield against Leeds at the weekend would see him dictate the game, destroy the opposition and solve world poverty; but ultimately he was a little out-muscled. Back in his natural habitat of the left flank he looked far more like his old self, offering touches of class no-one else on the pitch could match.

Bentley

Much-maligned, and unlikely to play for us again if ‘Arry can possibly get away with it, but he is really not a bad player. Crossing with both feet he produced some that were delicious and some that went awry, but on the whole it was a decent shift. Equally pleasing was his attitude, the brylcreemed one showing a good wholesome work-rate. And while it does not count for much, we at AANP Towers rather approved of the fact that on a night as cold as yesterday he did not pitch up with gloves and tights, but played in short sleeves. Good lad.

Bale

He still not been given a stern defensive test, but this was another welcome attacking performance from the lad, and with Modders cutting infield Bale’s presence bombing up the flank has gone down swimmingly.  I think we had all forgotten what it was like to have an over-lapping full-back merrily tearing forward at every opportunity, but he augments attack so well that I rather conveniently include him in this little parade of honour, even though I am supposedly lauding the midfielders. Bale may not be the finished article, but he’s still a whipper-snapper and got bundles of potential - so hopefully he will live long and prosper at the Lane, even if BAE does swan straight back into the starting line-up when fit.

All that may have read like a rather over-enthusiastic canticle of praise; not so. There were moments of needless sloppiness; we still desperately miss Lennon; and a more incisive team might have given us more problems than Fulham. However, after some of the horrors we have witnessed at the Lane this season, a nice straightforward victory without hitting top gear – aided by a healthy dose of luck in front of goal – were more than welcome. I’ll happily settle for at least one more of those before I start lambasting the players for lack of entertainment.

AANP’s first book, Spurs’ Cult Heroes, comes out on 16 Feb and is now available to pre-order from WHSmith, Amazon , Tesco, Waterstones and Play

You can become a Facebook fan of Spurs’ Cult Heroes and AANP here, follow on Twitter here

And as ever, all are most welcome to leave memories - and browse those of others - regarding some of the players to be featured in Spurs’ Cult Heroes: Danny Blanchflower here, Dave Mackay here, Cliff Jones here, Martin Chivers here, Alan Gilzean here, Pat Jennings here, Cyril Knowles here, Steve Perryman here, Glenn Hoddle here, Chris Waddle here, Ossie and Ricky here, Gary Mabbutt here, Graham Roberts here, Jimmy Greaves here, Clive Allen here, Jürgen Klinsmann here, David Ginola here, Paul Gascoigne here