All Action, No Plot

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Another Mental All-Action Week At Spurs!!!

No transfers. Not even any rumours. And this following a record number of clean sheets at home, and a seemingly endless run of one-nil wins. “All action”? Really?

Once again there is nothing to report from the Lane, so I’m just going to ramble away a little stream of consciousness – by all means duck out now and go youtube a Michael Jackson song or something.Once Upon A Time…

Once upon a time the title “All Action, No Plot” made perfect sense for a Spurs blog. Alright, you pedants, maybe not perfect sense – I suppose “Spurs-Tottenham-Hotspur-White-Hart-Lane-Yiddo-COYS-Two-Points-Eight-Games-Blog” would probably be statistically more suitable for search engines. But you get the point. All action, no plot – we’re that sort of team.

Or rather, we were that sort of team. Once upon a time, not so long ago. When I’m a millionaire I’ll build a Sistine chapel-style ceiling at AANP Towers, decorated with Mabbutt’s own-goal in the ’87 Cup Final to commemorate the first game I ever watched (or remember watching). It was a suitably mad-cap game, and rather set the tone. There is no shortage of other moments that can be immortalised in blue and lilywhite (and yellow) on my ceiling – Gazza and Lineker destroying l’Arse; Jurgen spearheading a 5-0-5 formation; the night of a thousand thrown away half-time leads; and more 4-4 draws than you can wave a stick at. Plenty of action there, and precious little plot.

Off the pitch, it’s similarly mental – squillions of pounds flung at managers on limited time, while the good folk of N17 relentlessly bay for champagne football and the blood of Jermaine Jenas.

Thus, the name “All Action, No Plot” was decided upon in a few milliseconds with a couple of mates in a foreign bar, allowing us to get on with the more pressing business of casting a modern-day Hollywood remake of The A-Team*.

Times Are A-Changing

However, that madcap act-first-think-later mentality at Spurs is now seemingly being replaced by something far more thoughtful and considered. The settled back-four, the consistent team-selection, the growing confidence that we will win at home.

I never thought the day would come, but I readily admit – this maturity is being welcomed with open arms at AANP Towers. It’s a seminal moment, rather like that point in Rocky IV when the Soviets start jeering Dolph Lundgren and cheering Stallone. Or the moment in Escape to Victory when the Nazis cheers Pele’s overhead kick. There is less action and more plot at the Lane – and AANP likes it. Cripes.

It’s not that we’re turning into one of the dull, boring, soporific also-rans of the Premiership, a George Graham Arsenal. Not at all.  We still have bundles of creativity, and play football that is pleasing on the eye. None of that long-ball nonsense. In fact, precious few goals from crosses either – which suggests that our strikers really ought to work on their heading. No, the football looks fine, and, especially on the counter-attack, can be quite breathtaking, but is complemented by a sturdy defensive platform.

And now as the summer stretches out, behind the thick curtain of rumour, it transpires that there is actually precious little happening. Again this lack of action, and hint of plot, is viewed with approval at AANP Towers. I’d have bought a tennis racket and smashed it on some grass if we’d gone through another summer of ripping up the spine of the squad and bringing in squillions of pounds worth of unproven attackers (although I’m well aware that this might yet happen).

So far however, the approach seems relatively circumspect – no wholesale clearout, yet, and no heinous sum splashed out on an unknown foreign striker. It suggests that the management know what they want to do this summer, and are primarily aiming to maintain stability.

The title of this little corner of the internet will remain the same, and in all other walks of life the all-action-no-plot mentality remains the breathless approach of choice, but it pleases me to note that by gently turning down the all-action-no-plot meter at Spurs we seem to be making progress.

 

* = I’d have gone for George Clooney as Hannibal; Jim Carrey as Murdock; some generic pretty-boy – possibly Johnny Depp – as Face; and B.A. is a tough one. Vin Diesel? Ving Rhames? Anyone else whose name begins with “Vin”?

10 Responses

  1. davspurs Says:

    Well said the key to our return to wiining ways is consitantly picking the same team and making wise subs somthing harry is still lacking upto now .Why spme spurs fans are clammering for signings baffles me ,we bought a tem that whas going to get us in the top four they dident but that doesent meen they are not good enough and if we dont sell any of our top players hudds pav bent bently bale hutton dawson.We will do well but if we sell to our rivals then it will be deja vue another season of mediocrety

  2. Anonymous Says:

    Are we spurs losing our ambition as a club? Harry was report to have said we cant compete with Man City, also talks of top 6 finish………. But did’nt harry say top 4 when he joined???? Did we not sack Jol because he took us to 5th twice and we wanted more???? Did we lose our ambition and why do we seem to have financial problems this year, do we really have to sell to buy???? or is that just a mind game or did we blow millions and run out of cash???

  3. billiospur Says:

    wanting to bring in players……each year but
    there has been a change with redknapp as he seeks the credibility ,running his
    biggest club to date…..maybe a couple of players left midfield and support for king?

    but we still have maturing quality in the club .i for one would like to see de santos on the left ? also the one season settled team have been through some learning curves……..toughen and fine tune

  4. Anonymous Says:

    It’s about time somebody wrote an article that makes sense. The best team we’ve had recently was not the Berbatov 5th place team but the team the year before. The reason why is because we had established a consistent squad who had an identity and everyone on the team knew their roles.
    Spurs do need a left winger (still) and that’s really it. Graduate a few kids like Taraabt and Bostock that will provide plenty good cover and give Pav and Defoe a good run at having a partnership. Get rid of Keane for christ’s sake because he does nothing but hold our aggressive play. I see a Luka and Palacios partnership turning into a classic one.

  5. Rwools167 Says:

    Last time we had a slow considered close season the only player we bought was Tramezzani look how that thurned out!

  6. col Says:

    Why when although everyone in all walks of life and business are having to make economies,and as a club we wont break the wage structure even if it means losing out on some class players who could do a job for us,are we considering selling Dos santos or at least Harry does not seem to rate him but surely he maybe able to do us a srevice.If it worked out it would save us a tidy sum. How will we know until he is given a run.What little i have seen of him he looked a great young player,in what chance he was given in the UEFA cup last season he played well in an understrength team that was expected to go out of competition to save our prem status.If only as a squad player i hope he is kept for one more season and given a chance.Try him in the Carling cup and see what the first choice team can do in league.I know there are doubts about his being tough enough for the prem but at Ipswich they thought he was great and Ipswich must hope to try and gain prem status so how far short of the mark can he be and we gave Lennon a chance and there are some question marks about certain aspects of his game but you would expect Lennon to play if he was fit.

  7. Norm Says:

    If you want to discuss something how about the newspapers intepretation of Harry’s Conversation with Luis Figo at a Celebrity Golf Match. He is coming out of retirement to play for Spurs

  8. JohnnyB Says:

    I’d go for Ving Rhames as BA and Leonardo DiCaprio as Face.

  9. JimmyG2 Says:

    I want a nice quiet transfer window, a settled team, no excitement,just steady progress with a set of players we all know(and love, well most of them)
    Its called team building,bonding gelling, grouting or something.Its unusual for Spurs but the frenetic approach didn’t work when we sacked Mr.Jol so lets give it a go this way.
    We probably haven’t signed anyone because we can’t afford anybody good or they would rather go to Man.City for oodles of squillions.
    Nice blog.

  10. Fred Says:

    In all seriousness, why couldn’t we have some people with some basic common sense like yourself making decisions at the club…

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