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Sunderland – Spurs Preview: Not Good Enough for MoTD

A bit of a bonus game this. Somehow, amidst the hurly-burly of all those cup excursions, we’ve earned ourselves a game in hand – and the opportunity to haemorrhage blood from the nose by hitting the dizzy heights of tenth, within five points of West Ham in the likely Uefa spot of seventh. Even more excitingly, with ours being the only Premiership fixture tomorrow, does this mean that we get an entire Match of the Day to ourselves? Crumbs, they can show the entire game! Sunderland-Spurs would normally be tossed out to Tony Gubba to paint a tedious shade of grey, but if we’re the only game we’ll get the brilliant Steve Wilson, and his impeccable combo of excitement and reason!Alas, it’s not to be. They’re not giving us Steve Wilson. They’re not even giving us Gubba. There will be no MoTD at all this Saturday. They don’t deem our game sufficient to keep the programme on air this week. The ignominy.

More mundanely, the match itself – nigh on impossible to predict. This season, and indeed just the last few weeks, has seen on display every one of the multiple personalities of that strange schizophrenic beast that is Tottenham Hotspur 2008-09. Woeful defeats to Burnley and Shakhtar; creditable draws against l’Arse and Man Utd; impressive wins against Stoke, Hull and Boro. Gazing into my crystal ball the only words that appear are “confused.com”.

The trip to the north-east will throw up some friends past, present and quite possibly future. I personally vetoed the summer sale of Steed, but unbelievably it went ahead anyway, and he might well offer a pointed reminder of what we’re lacking on the left. Teemu Tainio I expect to make less of an impact, if he’s even fit, while Chimbonda is unlikely to be the most popular man in the stadium come kick-off. Nothing new there, then. The most interesting sub-plot will be about eight foot ten and playing up-front for Sunderland. A good chance for all of us to get 90 minutes of Kenwyne Jones and make some snap-judgements about whether he’ll be worth the £14 million odd we’ll probably bid for him in the summer. Don’t’ strive too hard to impress us, will you Kenwyne?

And Now For Something Completely Different… 

Little Miss Ronaldo (to Taylor): “You’re rubbish.”
[Pretty subjective, but if anyone is entitled to make that call it’s probably the World Football of the Year]

Taylor: “Yeah? Well you’re ugly.”
[Genius! Talk about touching a nerve. Take a bow son]

Little Miss Ronaldo: “You’re still rubbish.”

Taylor: “And you’re still ugly.”

Impossible to read that without smiling. I can’t help thinking Ronaldo went home and cried all night into his pillow after that. Heart-warming stuff.

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Published in Friday, March 6th, 2009, at 3:39 pm, and filed under Spurs preview.

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11 Responses

  1. Phil Brooks Says:

    glad you’ve given the opportunity for me to get off my chest what a total monkey-fucking ratgoat cris ronaldo is. he’s not as good as rio or vidic. and he is a bit greasy, slimy-looking. he’s not properly beautiful like david beckham. NOBODY is beautiful like david beckham.

    as for spurs sun’lund, who knows.. i don’t see why we shouldn’t beat them!

  2. Spooky Says:

    “You’re rubbish.”
    “Yeah? Well you’re ugly.”
    “You’re still rubbish.”
    “And you’re still ugly.”

    Some email this to Quentin Tarantino. Pulp Fiction II has just written itself!

  3. davspurs Says:

    Want to no why spurs struggle against weaker teams on paper .The answer is energy and iam not talking drinks that are dished out when theres a break in play but closing down energy and late goals weight loss red faces and knecks the sure signes of ephedrine abuse i discovered a top team were taking this illegal drug and to cut a long story short because players have left this club other teams have now joined in and we are about to play one .just to tell you a few players with anorexic looks to show what it does if you take to much take a look at dean whitehead darren fletcher scirtel just to name a few even fatty reid has lost weight and malbranque is looking gaunt take a look at kanshelsky from fulham and the rest i could go on but just thought i would let you no coys

  4. yosemite_sam Says:

    davspurs, often to be found spouting the same ephedrine conspiracy b*llox on harry hotspur. Ya gotta love him, he’s a whopper.

  5. Cuba Montana Says:

    It’s actually a fact that all competitive sports people use enhancers, there’s no conspiracy at all as many forms of enchancers are natural products, however synthetic use of ephedrine in the form of amphetamine and methamphetamine products have been hugely improved in recent years in China, where the industry is worth millions.

    Professional sportsman are superhuman with a little help of the improvements in science and highly upto date and knowledgeable medical staff, especially when it’s got to do with anti inflammatory medicine’s and such like.

    How else do you think Ledley King can still keep playing without cartilage? How does Gerard get a knock one week and turn up for a midweek game? Plus keep performing throughout the whole season?

    We will see the effects of this amount of damage to the human body and system in the next generation of sports people. Some of these stars need to be earning huge sums in order to pay for the lifelong medical bills they will have to endure for the rest of their lives.

  6. astromesmo Says:

    Davspurs has the lungs of a free-diver… He can say all that sentence in real life.

  7. Bimmi Says:

    first time poster.. recently got into reading this blog and am impressed.. definitely up there with Harry’s and Spooky’s page..

    Anyway i hear what you’re saying re. MoTD, they are, however, showing an hour long highlight of the game on Sky Sports tonight at 10.30.. so that’s something i suppose..

    and Davspurs will you give it a rest.. we’re sick of you and you’re bloody drug abuse THEORY..

  8. davspurs Says:

    I WONT GIVE UP IF I FOUND OUT WHY THE FUCK SHOULD MY ENJOYMENT BE SPOILED ANYWAY MY BELOVED SPURS ARE INCHING THERE WAY UP TO THE FUCKERS THAT STARTED ME OFF. AND WHY SHOULD I SAY NEWT WHEN MY TEAM GETS TURNED OVER BY SKELETONS ON ENERGY DRUGS SO FUCK OF ITS FUCKING LIVERPOOL AND UTD THAT YOU SHOULD INSULT NOT POOR DAVSPURS .HE IS A LEGEND .SPOTTING CHEATS BOTH PAKISTAN BOWLERS DWANE CHAMBERS .BASBALL HOME RUN CHAMP .MARADONA MATT STEVENS GRASE .JONES ALL FUCKIN CHEATS ITS THESE YOU SHOULD BE CALLING AND IF YOU LOVE SPURS THEN DONT KNOCK DAV HE LIVES 12 MILES FROM THE DURACELL BUNNIES THAT GAVE MY NEPHEW THESE DRUGS AND HIS RUGBY TEAM ARE ON THERE THIRD PROMOTION SO IF YOU WANT MAN UTD AND LIVERSKINT TO WIN EVERYTHING THEN I WILL STOP MY CRUSADE AND THIS WILL BE MY LAST MESSAGE ON DRUGS LET THEM KILL THEMSELVES FROM NOW ON I WILL JUST LEAVE THE CHEATS TO GET ON WITH IT .DEAN WHITHEAD AND FLETCHER CARRICK AN CO. BY . COYS

  9. Phil Brooks Says:

    speaking of drugs.. Davspurs, whatever you’re on… can i have some?

    serious though, you make a point. far too much drugs in sports. was reading about dwayne chambers the other day and reckon they should stick a great big knitting needle through his muscles to drain all the juice out. total unrepentant cocksmoker. disgrace to british sport.

  10. DAVSPURS Says:

    News flash paddy helps sheffield team beat preston in semis is energy whas superb and he made some oustanding saves is wife said he couldent keep still after is man of the match performance .So he took the dog for a 20 mile walk .Paddy had to carry the poor dog after 5 miles were does he get is stamina from?

  11. DAVSPURS Says:

    HI lads looking forward to playing Bolton rugby team messrs Davies and co hope Harry plays GOMES CORLUKA DAWSON HUDDLESTIONE BASSONG—- LENNON PALACIOS KRANJCAR KEANE DEFOE CROUCH .This will give us height and movement something we will need to combat Davies and Taylors free kicks. Ecotto is two small for this game and will get out muscled .This game will tell all spurs fans if we have what it takes to challenge the top four Liverpool struggled to win at Bolton and only came back when there energy went down with Davies sending off Lets hope he get sent of again spurs 3-1

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